Excuse the typos

I think I didnt really read what I typed here when I typed.. Sekali, udah baca balik, byk spelling errors.. *sigh* So yay.... enjoy reading and if salah ejaan atu, diam saja sssshhhhh...

A day in my life

Coffee helps!!!!! Lots and lots of coffee.......... (@.@)
The desk.. Where all my masterpieces are produced
The PLANNER: (Top to bottom) Revision schedule, prayer times, weekly timetable, assignment lists
The textbooks................................................... I cant even describe 'em

Some pics inda pedah2

This is how we cook Maggi Goreng here.. haha.. the oil and the ketchup were frozen.. So we have to melt it first, by boiling it.. Heh.. kan makan maggi pun payah.. byk kraja
A little play I choreographed... Something I do to relive stress
Kiki: the good parent hahah... C kiki begambar sama the stuff toys that I get for my sistas back home, during my trip to BEAULIEU (<--- Lurus kh d spelling? I forgot :x) The chips model... haha.. Kiki showing off his potential for the next big thing!!

Bday

Haha.. last night at around 7pm, the delivery guy rang and our food arrived!! Yey... You see, last night we celebrated our housemate's (Afiq) 19th bday... So, me, Erni and Naq planned a "surprise" for him.. (last minute lagi tu eh).. Each of us contribute and get pizza, chicken, coke and 4 pieces of cherry cheesecakes.. Hahha.. bulih lah.. I think last night was the first time in a long time that us four sat down and eat ... sambil creta2 hahah.. I think because our time table inda sama and obviously, its hard to see each other masa siang. Even masa malam, me and Erni would be really busy finishing up our assignments (Which reminds me I still have A LOT to do!!! How can I even forget that?? LOL) hahah.. iatah so kami jrg lagi mkn sama2

It was nice, tanya khabar (cali ah, sedangkn tinggal serumah) hehhe.. and creta2 pengalaman masing2, mcm baru th kenal ani bah.. ahaha.. it was fun though. Yg benarnya, on Saturday, me and my cousin aher bangun (Since its off day), we were like practically giving ourselves a much needed break from the continuous datelines!! Iatah, since kami aher bngun, so we were like belepak d dapur and creta2 pasal our lives and our plan for the future plus gosip2 sikit hahah.. biasa bini2... Iatah, since kami ani terlampau engaged in the conversation ani, sampai we lost track of time.. haha.. adakh kami lepak from tgh mlm until around 6 or 7 in the morning????? Capi eh.. but then we planned to go to uni to take some pictures.. haha...while Afiq and Naq went on a trip to Beaulieu.. So, kami ani plan kan ke Uni, kan ke Cooperatives bali bread, ke ATM ambil duit kn byr rent and maybe tarus order makanan..

Sekali, since inda betidur and it was realllllllllly cold.. So we decided to put out little adventure to uni on hold... Lagipun, there 's not much to see around this time of month. So we just went to ATM, buy bread and make an order for the feast later that night. Udah balik rumah, we were tired berabis and tidur,............................... until th d delivery men sampai bawa makanan kul 7 mlm. hahahhaa.. siuk eh, rilex nada assignment kn d pikirkan..

But now, back to the reality, DATELINES..... Although it's like only 2 more weeks left before yhe Christmas holiday... I dont think I'd be enjoying myself very much masa tu.. Although m looking forward for our trip to NewCastle, Edinburgh and ARMSTERDAM..... Weeeeiiiiiii Well, here are couple of pictures from the feast..

For Chiaki -- Teppei Koike

For Ayumi - Gazzette

For Shimizo - Tegomass

For Hanako

Especially for my mother, Hjh Asiah Hj Mohamad

The 3 amigos.

Umi Alvina Hj Munap, Noor Nela Haji Awang and Erni Rosmaini Haji Munap.. We are cousins..Well those two at the ends are siblings.. We went to UBD together, ALL first degree in teaching hahaha..and all of us got 2:1..yuhu.. now, we are all engaged THIS YEAR!! And our partners are semua urg TUTONG??? Coincidence??? Hahhaha..So, there we are the three amigos. BTW, Erni is currently doing her masters with me here in Southampton, me doing Geography, her doing Maths..

Masa my departure to UK, 22/09/2008...

This was masa I organised a BBQ as a celebration that I got a job.. I think. Dont really remember.. I was being the photographer, with the kids enjoying themselves (battling the dance) while the guys hahah bbq ayam d luar..kesian...

Me and Lida as well as Rosho (not in picture) decided to spend time together as a farewall party for my last day at work :( So, we ate lunch at Pizza Hut with Mawar and also Bareezah but then they have to attend workhop (which I was also supposed to attend :P) so us 3 went to the Arcade and jadi kanak2 sekajap haha.. This image was us in one of the karaoke box..

Me in the Geography Department, SMJA.. Posted there on 1/4/2008.. until 30/8/2008. I was at the back because the photographer arranged us in a way the tall goes at the back.. haha.. and this was supposed to be the "free-style" hahha. Girls rule!!

Anna Abu Bakar and Nela Awang: Two former reporters from The Brunei Times... Behind me is my desk haha..siuk kali ah, I got my own desk and own PC .. good times

Me surrounded by my students from 4Sc1, SOAS College, 2007.. Yup, all boys~~

Preparation for Graduation 11 Sept 2007: Effa, Me, Earnny and Ira

Me, Effa, Earnny and Hjh Anne during our visit to Sek Men Saidina Othman, Bukit Beruang Tutong for our module's "School Organisation" case study.. Hahaha I remember I was the "driver" and I used aniki's corolla and the car was MANUAL.. yuhu to me..

Now I have in total 7 assignments!!! bwooooooooooooooooooooooooo... Ryte now what I can summarise is that "Biological and environmental science as well as Geophysics" that's what i'm actually doing right now. Alhamdulillah my Google Earth KML Programming is done..out of the scene.. Now all left:

1) A report on the different views and interpretation of Spatial Analysis as well as its application in various fields of study

2) A report on satellite instrumentation for earthquake monitoring

3) A laboratory report for Geographic Information Systems: Idrisi Andes

4) A laboratory report for Remote Sensing or Earth Observation via Envi software

5) A report and presentation on Earth observation methods for Forest Fires detection to formulate possible precautionary measures

6)A report on a case study of Northern Territories, Australia, evaluating the use of remote sensing for assessing fire risk.

7) A report and presentation on the issues of Poverty and Food Security

Wahh.. so many things to do and so little time... I've been spending time reading in the library but mcm not enough.. Theres too much research to do. And I learnt from my friend also my cousin... that she do not have exams.... Wah.. so easy ey.. She only have to worry about courseworks.. How I wish I do not have exams.. Why have exams when there is already plenty of work to do.. I realised this is not "school-level" work anymore but Masters.. so have to pay the price hahaha..sabar2.. I've had worst.. back in UBD.. I survived with unexpectedly good grades with so many things happening at once.. mulah sawal left us, I was involved in a serious car accident and missed out a lot of lectures..

I remember that time, first day of lecture and I was involved in a car accident with aniki.. It was severe that I had a couple of stitches in my face (below my eyes, my left cheek, my chin and under my mouth) I had to used sun-protection cream when I went out coz technically the left side of my face was almost peeled off. Then, coming back to uni was tough since I missed a lot and I had no idea what the lecturer was talking about. Have to do my own studies by myself..

Then, not long after my recovery.. I got the sad news that Sawal was no longer with us. I was devastated!! I feel like Allah had given me the ultimate challenge. During the difficult times, I was not able to concentrate on my studies and as a result.. I got a "D" as my overall score for the first semester. At least I did not failed, I thought.. But then I realised, I should not be taken aback with it, instead I channelled my energy to studying.. I believe that I am much better than a D and can perform way better.. His death and all that I had faced, I take them as a force to push me ahead and Alhamdulillah... my grades improved.

Along the way, I had another car accident!! I know.. I was like so jinxed!! Hahha.. then, there were times that aniki enrolled in the army and had to be in camp for a long time. Then, I have three jobs to juggle.. As a student, a household manager (mom have a business and dad works in shifts..so yeah..I was the leader of the pack!!) and to be my mother's driver and personal assistant whenever dad works afternoon and night shifts.. It was tiring and to balance both with my studies was really hard.. BUt then, I managed to pull through with the help of EHEM.. (my fiance). Yup, he had given me the upmost support and is always there to help me out and shout out "Gambatte" when I feel like I can no longer do it!!

Then, comes the Teaching Practise as the last module to get the degree. I was sent to SOAS... an all-boy school.. I was horrified when I found out and my cousin told me that the school was bad news.. Waaaa.. I was ready to consult the supervisor to ask for another school. First day at SOAS was bad................................................. I was always shy in front of people, not to imagine in a class full of hormons-driven male teenagers!!!! I thought I would froze to death right then!! So I told myself, it was another challenge and I have to face it. At last, I was close with the students and manage to had good times.. Until now, I still stay in touch with them (some of them though) ahha..

Graduation came and I was proud of myself. Besyukur and glad that I did not gave up back then. Because, if I did.. I would not be able to become what I am today and my parents as well as my family would suffer.. At one time, I do think that I want to quit uni and find a job to help my parents, but then I realised.. with just "A" level qualification, what job can I get that can support a family of 9??? I was thinking to end the struggle right then... so that my parents do not have to spend any money on my education anymore.. Sekali, I pondered if just gaji sedikit, I think I would make their lives much more difficult.. So, I carry on and in the end.. I got a good job as a reporter at The Brunei Times and earn good money.. Masa atu tah, I can really contribute to my family and I do not have to ask for any single penny from my parents.. I can pay for the car as well..

In BT, I learned a lot. ABout people and communication as well as self confidence. I also improved my writings hehe.. I get to know Nuri (photographer from Religious Affairs who happen to took the pictures for my engagement) and Anna (another reporter currently in Korea) and others.. They are different and I was out of my comfort zone.. But, I survived BT and still manage to maintain the same old Nela but develop other qualities... I became more confident, more independent and more mature.

Now, I;m pursuing my dreams.. I had always dreamt to further my studies in a foreign land.. That was exactly what I wrote in my essay entitled "cita-cita saya" back in Primary School. After this, I would relax and take some time off.. spend more times with family, and possibly getting married first.. I am still thinking of getting a PHD..maybe soon later, when everything settles down, but I wont forget it

From kaka to all

The one I will never forget.. arwah Muhammad Khairul Anwar bin Haji Awang. You were the best thing that ever happened to our family. May Allah bless your soul..

Me, Kumiko.. the Big Sis.. I might be far.. but you all are close in my heart. I love you all unconditionally and pray for your success in life. I will not leave you unattended and will help you to get through the hard times. You can depend on me as I would love nothing than all of you to be happy.. I miss and love each and everyone of you.. My family

Kuroda, the sole-survivor. Many things had happened in the past and I know there is a growing gap between us. I wish we can be back like before, where we used to joke around and share stories till dawn ... good times.. I wish you would become the "aniki" that we loved and I pray for your well-beings and your success. Take care of yourself and the family.

Hanako, the youngest one. I know losing your hero (Sawal) was tough. You were quite rebellious back in the days showing your anger and sadness. But, you manage to pull through and make the best out of it. You're now a confident teenager and will not be easily shaken by your environment. You stand tall on your feet and face ordeals bravely. You'll grow up to be a wonderful person.

Shimizo, the shy one. I know underneath all that, you are responsible and a caring sister. You're always the one who take care of me when I'm sick, the one that I can easily talk to and youre the one who cried the hardest during my departure.. I know you're afraid, but I also know that deep inside you, you're willing to try.. So, please keep your heads up and charge the mountain!

Ayumi, the happy-go-lucky one. Before, I used to be really worried of you.. But you've grown up to be independent.. You are not afraid of challenges, although you're going to a new school with a new environment with no one familiar..Yet, you survived.. You're no longer the kid that I constantly have to look out for.. Go for it Ayu.

Chiaki, the patience one. I hope you all the best Jah.. Be yourself and keep strong okay.. I'm always here for you, although I'm far. Take care of yourself also, I know you always put others first before you.. I'm proud of you, sis..

Michiyo, the one I can rely on.. Be strong Bi, I know you'll be able to take care of everything. I have faith in you and will always pray for your success.. Do not give up yet..

I am lucky..

Everything is a blur.. I was at home all alone, not having any lectures and all.. I was doing my laundry.. it's winter. but since it was early in the morning and the sun was out.. I took the chance.. While doing the laundry, I was skyping with my mom and my sisters (mish u all) yup.. And I don't know why.. I was holding myself..holding my tears from rolling down my cheeks, holding my feelings, scared there would be an emotional outburts..I guess it was because whenever I saw her gentle, wrinkled face... I saw love, hope and trust.. Despite that, I also see a woman... a very strong and patience woman who is actually tired and exhausted but still trying to maintain the calm composure... potraying someone, a role model..good enough for the kids..

I always feel like crying whenever I see her face.. How i misses her smile and her gentle words.. "I know you can do it, I always have faith in you, believes in you" those words keep on repeating itself, clearly embedded in my mind, my drive, my motivation whenever I feel down or powerless.I never know that until I was here. I always know she loves me.. but I rarely hear her spoke the word of love, especially to me... But, I always loved her no matter what. In fact, I'm thankful she was hard on me.. back in my childhood.. because of that, i grew up to be someone she's proud of.. Then, i realise.. love does not mean that you have to cried it out loud and show the world...Its enough that you know... love is about letting go and having trust that one would not lose his/her way.. Yeah, that's love.. It was hard for her to let me go here, to be far from her sight but she trusts me that I will not forget to remember her..

Even at the airport two months ago..when I hugged her, me drown in tears.. afraid of the uncertainties and away from that comfort zone.. I did not see any single tear from her eyes, although I was able to see that she was trying not to cry, still trying at the last moment of goodbye..trying to be strong... At first, I was dissapointed.. Why didnt she cry like other mothers? Wont she miss me? Is she glad that I'm gone? I walked slowly to the door.. and I saw others crying reluctant to be separated from their families.. Then I understand, if she was to cry, I dont think I would be able to make that step, to embark on a new journey, a new future.. and that moment,..I thank her for her strength and I pray to Allah that I can be as strong as her, not easily distracted...

Mom, I love you and thank you for supporting me all the way.. Although life would have been much easier I was to stay... Being one of the eldest.. I held a very big responsibility.. I had a steady job and a firm future in hand.. Life would be much more comfortable for all of you that way, I can help the family..contributing my earnings, helping managing the house, looking after the siblings.. But yet, she let me go, believing that I can do much better here, building a new future... I think the hardest thing for a parent is to let go.. I promised I will never change and will always stay as the daughter that you've always had..

tiba-tiba aku teringat... I was browsing through my students FS.. (I do that for fun.. haha have I got no life or what??) and its funny to see all these youg people expressing their love to the opposite sexes. I mean, you2re young bah...get a life!! I mean, i dont think ny age of 13 or 14, you had finally meet your soulmate!! U have a long journey ahead of you and along the way, there will be others capable to attract your attention. Haha.. jgn tah gagas kan be gf or bf ani.. I survived my school years without a bf, and look where it got me now? I'm happy and has a bright future ahead, and guess what? I do not regret that I did not experience the HIgh school love life.. Coz now I have found someone who brings out the best of me.. its kesian and sayang to watch these young people getting all tangled up in this so called love??? Do you really know what it means? Wah...mcm marah.. its just that its frustrating that watching my students iski kan becinta but terabai pelajaran.. Just imagine this.. Youre in love and so young, naive, gullible and is blind to other interesting and amazing things that Allah bagi such as education.. Then, decided to get married early.. The husband have a job but the girl will be a stay-home mom. Then, along the way, since the guy is thrown into married life at an early age and did not have the chance to "enjoy" his life dulu, there is a possibiliy of a scanadl!! The excuse "bored with the wife who happens to be the girl he fell so madly in love with and promise to be with her for a lifetime"!! Indakan sedih?? Well, thats my opinion though. I do care about my students.. My advice is you can becinta, but be sure to put your studies in the first place dulu.. Inda rugi tu... and if u happen to inda dapat idup without a couple, just make sure that that person is someone that supported you and will make you more happier and successful, but not someone who will only bring you down, eventhough that someone happens to be good-looking!! Ciao..Wish you all the best with your life V(^.^)V

Hari ani inda berapa ada mood.. since I cant sleep d malam, payah kan tidur wah.. But one good thing though, I manage to finally completed my Google Earth KML Programming report d mlm around 11pm.. huhuhu.. And tadi hantar udah, puas hati lah, glad its over. Now.. 6 more to go. One sad news though, one of our group members decided to quit MSc and will continue next year. Now, we're down to 3 and all of us are international students. it came across mymind, siapa tah yg kan buat presentation ni?? Apparently that guy had reached his limit after 11 years of continuous studies and exams!! Hmm.. cian, baik jua I have my break before going to uni lagi sekali.. But, I wopuldnt really call it a break though since I was working my butt off.. Byk kraja.. CXame to think of it, I actually have 17 years of continuous education up to my my first degree in UBD. Then, keraja for a year then sambung g..I was tired.. but then I thought, if I can go through the gruesome 17 years of my life with no mental breakdown (alhamdulillah..,jauh palis..) inda ku minta.. Yup, why not just for another year?? Dats what I keep on telling myself.

Now, baru siap buat my practicals for GIS..Got another one to go for Earrth Observation. Well, i'll be staying back lagi coz i need to do some reading :( on Spatial Analysis.. yup i know, lame.. Hahha.. but a student got to do what a student got to do.. apakanz? Ani waiting for my lecture which actually starts in another 30 mins and I was thinking, why dont I update the blog or sumthing?? Hahaha.. bahagianya hidup dikelilingi uleh strange people and a whole loads of assignments.. sarcasm works for me..

Hmm.. I cant started on my programming report yet.. bwoh.. due in two days!!! I know I keep telling myself to make an early start..I did!!! But in the end, masih jua last minute.. Mental.. Next week is the spatial analysis report, then got the earthquake instrumentation.. then got the remote sensing and GIS report.. Woh... where can I find the time.. Wake up!!! LAzy Bum!! Lets not forget why u are here k, whats the purpose and all. Arggghhhh.. napa tia ku feeling malas ani.. I might be missing the family and my ehem jua huhuuhu (ok, m not trying to be super-duper mushy mushy now).. Its like now nada kan d buat.. Its just report and report and lecture and practical.. I swear m gonna have a really good tym in Newcastle, Edinburgh and Amsterdam this holiday!! YEEEEEEEHAAAAA...

Will posts some picz soon

RAYA in Southampton

We celebrated raya here in Southampton, 3 days earlier in Brunei. Inda berapa siuk the celebration but ok lah. We do have open houses among ourselves. This one was taken masa arah rumah Pg Isa, this Bruneian doing his PHD with his wife.. hehe.. romantic kali ah

The Mall

Ok, the favourite part of everyone....the mall. The main mall here is called West Quay, its big, compared to Brunei's The Mall, until now alum abis semua ku round ehe.. Around West Quay, the centre ada banyak kadai lagi like Primark, kadai baju MURAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH in pounds i mean hehhe... Well, here are some pics.. apparently inda bulih menggambar d dalam West Quay ehhe.. but we managed to seludup some pics anyway

Where I shop

Around the city, this is where we got our Halal meat all the time. But there are also other places like Asda, where its like Giant, or Hua Ho, having cheaper products of their own brands..

This is the main library in the campus, The Hartley library. Its HUGE.... hehe.. I feel so Harry Potter....hehe
Another photo from my trip to Beaulieu..my favourite car of all the exhibits

As an induction programme for the International Student, the School of Geography organised a school trip to Bealieu, in the New Forest. The area was really nice.. with lots to see.. Ada castle, a traditional english village across the lake, a collection of cars and also a James Bond Experience museum. A must see for those automobile lovers. Well, here are some of the pics..enjoy V(^.^)V

I find the duckies to be really cute.. hehe.. besusun ani bah. Around my school, there were a pond.. really nice.. and there are plenty of spots for a picnic hehe.... Will do that someday when my fiance gets here.. He will be visiting me next year and will be going back to Brunei with me..

My school, School of Geography, University of Southampton, The "Shackleton" Building ehe.. nice huh..
This was taken masa the first day of induction, tym registration of International students.. Siuklah.. byk freebies.. My first time inda betudung.. Now, m back to my normal self..

My new Home:

We arrived at the Heathrow Airport, London, where officers from the Brunei Hall were in the waiting hall, welcoming us to our new home.. Waiting for the bus was like forever.... Lama banar, maybe because we arrived early in the morning. hehe.. Then, kami kana bawa ke Brunei Hall, where we attend a briefing on students life. For a moment, i still cant believe I was already here, away from everyone I loved (except for my cousin of course, she was with me all the time ehe). then, when others stay for the night at the hall, me, my cousin and two other students going to Southampton find the 15 hours flight tiring and decided to go straight to our rented home in Woodcote Road, Southampton Hampshire, staart unpacking and SLEEEEEEEPPP.. hehe.. The Brunei Hall people arranged our transportation, and after the 15 hours flight, 1 hour bus ride, we have to be in a van for another 1hr 30mins huhuhuhu.. The two guys that I mentioned were also friends with our two other housemates.. They are Iqbal and Izwan.. whom we feel closed to and comfortable with. Until now, they were like our little brothers .. Arriving at home, we started to unpack and had an early rest because induction started the next day.. huhu.. But I remember that sahur was weird that there was no more familiar faces around the dining table ...I cried in my heart..

22/09/2008 -- Goodbye Brunei.. The time has come for me to pursue my dreams and ambitions, a step forward towards a future.. The flight was scheduled after sungkai. But, I checked in earlier, putting all my luggages in the cargo earlier in the afternoon. I had always been a strong and independent person. It never came across my mind that I will be missing those I left behind so much.. I never expected to see myslef crying in the embrace of people. But then, when I realised it, I was hugging my little sister who was sobbing so hard. Although my intention was to calm her, to assure her that I will always contact her, my heart became so fragile that I started to shed tears.. Adik was crying really hard and the others started to follow. Words after words of encouragement and motivation were wispered into my ears, giving me faith that I will always have them by my side, supporting my every move and cheering me all the way.. I was crying really hard when i hugged tua, who has always been there and is more that an aunt, but more like a mother. She did not even look me in the eye, maybe because she would find it hard to let go. I must respect my parents though. After seeing my uncle and auntie crying so hard over their daughter (my cousin, who is also going with me) I expect they would be acting the same. But they weren't. They were very calm but I can feel their shaky hands when I kissed them. Then I learned that they have to keep a straight face, sending me away with a smile, hoping that I can be strong. Then, I find him, My fiance. My loving fiance, who has always been there, througout the whole process. In fact, I was not sure I wanted to do this, considereing that I've had a good job and a future. But, he pushed me to take that next step, believing in me.. Even when I almost give up (when filling in teh application form).. he was there. He was the first I called, telling him the good/bad news that I got into the university and when I got the scholarship.. I still remember his trembling hands holding mine tight, as if not to let go, but also to assure me that he will always be there.. (At the airport L to R: Waina, the agent who deal with our university application, Erni, my cousin who happen to be in the same uni and we are staying in the same house, Aza, who is also a cousin of mine, Aziz going to Kent, Mizah also going to Kent and Me)

my sign

Graphics & Myspace layouts